I'm going to tell you how compassion and empathy has helped me lead a team and how it can help you as well.

I was asked to lead a team a few years ago where I would be responsible for ten engineers delivering quality customer support and projects. I was excited and worried at the same time. The problem was, I had never lead a team before up until that moment in my career. I was an individual contributor, an engineer back then. So I had self-doubts about how would I handle people, their mistakes and the pressure that comes with it. Especially when the work was demanding, I knew there were bound to be mistakes.

Do I have it in me to lead the team with empathy?

Turns out I did. Here are 4 things I try to practice more often and has made me a better leader.

Let's dive in.

#1 Take a moment: 

When your report does a serious mistake the first thing to do is to get a handle of your own emotions - anger, frustration or whatever the case maybe. Take a step back and control your own emotional response. Take some time to cool off so you can see the situation with more detachment.

#2 Listen to them patiently:

You have to listen to them. You have to be genuinely interested in their side of the story without judging.

#3 Put yourself in their shoes: 

Taking a step back will give you the ability to empathize with your employee.

Research has shown positions of power tend to lower our natural inclination for empathy. So it is particularly important that managers have the self-awareness to make sure they practice seeing situations from their employees perspective.

#4 Forgive: 

Empathy helps you forgive. Forgiveness not only strengthens your relationship by promoting loyalty, it turns out that it is also good for you. Studies have shown forgiveness makes happier and more satisfied with life, significantly reducing stress and negative emotions.

When trust, loyalty, and creativity are high and stress is low, employees are happier and more productive and turnover is lower.

But practicing above empathy skills does not mean that you let them off the hook, but by choosing a compassionate response when they know they've made a mistake, they are not destroyed, they have learned a lesson and they want to improve for you because you've been kind to them.